It is best that we can come to an understanding regarding the nature of those cells that our clinicians determine to be "cancerous" and how the behaviour of those cells impacts on our lives. I use the word "lives" quite deliberately here and not the singular because the very diagnosis of this illness, immediately impacts on our family, our friends and acquaintances and even upon those people who we are yet to meet.
It is an unfortunate fact that the very word cancer, carries with it an implicit warning of our mortality. Indeed, many among us have a pre-conceived notion that a diagnosis of cancer is a pre-determined announcement of impending death. This notion, I have observed, is quite common until such diagnosis becomes personal, where-upon an almost instantaneous determination to live comes about.
When working with people with a diagnosis of cancer, I have frequently observed that, no matter what their conscious observations are, they see cancer as some kind of entity. Ask them to draw their cancer in an art therapy session, and invariably we see drawings and sketches of some kind of beastly thing. We see shark like creatures with razor sharp teeth ready to attack the patient's normal, healthy being, we see prison bars implying that the patient is helpless to do anything about their condition - almost never, do we see drawings of beauty. A diagnosis of cancer weighs heavily upon us.
We need to educate ourselves about the behaviour of the cells that our doctors have determined to be cancerous. We need to understand that cancer cells are simply normal cells that have quite simply, lost the programming to, well, behave normally. And that is that they have "forgotten" to die and are caught in the replicating loop of their life cycle. This programmed death of cells is referred to medically as apoptosis and may be implicated in the beginning and the spread of cancer. cancer cells were once normal cells that may have had damage to their DNA and the body's immune system, would normally dispose of them in just the same way as it would for any other abnormality. It is not only a matter of getting rid of these cancer cells, but allowing our immune system to be able to identify them as abnormal and so dispose of them in the normal way.
Given that what I have said here may be true, we have identified then, at least two areas on which to concentrate and those are the areas of diet and the psychological aspect of life with cancer.
I have spoken previously of diet and so, today, I would like to begin to address the way in which we think about the aspects of this illness and who it affects our life.
We need to become empowered. Many people, when experiencing an illness - any illness, tend toward victimhood. Just look at almost any man when he gets a cold. Men are always certain that no one else could have ever felt as bad as they feel now, with this cold or flu. They become victims and why not? Doesn't everyone else feel sorry for them (at least for a short while) and look after them? Fetch their meals, get their medications, fluff up their pillow. Feels good, this victim-hood. Feels like something that could go on for a while - and sometimes it does. Sometimes being a victim has it's rewards. People do things for us, empathise where little empathy had previously been shown. It is comforting to know that people feel for us, we feel, somehow, valued. It's easy to stay here, being the victim, being the centre of attention. The trouble is that being a victim, takes away our power. This state of mind is exactly the opposite of the state of mind we need in order to heal.
When we do not understand something, we gain understanding within the context of our unique experiences. For example, if we see cancer as an illness that is not curable then that becomes our understanding with little likelihood of reversal of those expectations. Your definition of cancer will be that it is a death sentence, unless your knowledge base regarding the disease and it's implications is not broadened to include the possibility that people do survive, that long term relief is possible and that people who experience the illness can lead vastly improved lives through it's intervention.
Knowledge is the key here.
Like most things in life, goals need to be set. It's fine to conceptualise the prospect of long-term survival, but unless there are goals set to do certain things in order to achieve such survival, then it will remain only a dream. We need to approach our survival as a process of pre-determined steps to prevent our illness becoming our life. I have seen many people become defined by their illness, just as others may be defined by their sexuality or social status. These people are victims and powerless to be or do anything else, other than who they are or where they are, because of where they are in their head.
If you want something different, set your goals, specifically, in written form, including all of the emotions that you can muster. Be those goals, see yourself at the place where they lead you. Experience, in your mind, all of the emotions and senses that will be involved when you achieve them. Feel what it is like to once again be healthy and fit. How do you feel in that moment? What will you do? Where do you want to go, now that you are well? How does that make you feel? As Jim Rohn said, this is like the set of your sails. The set of your sails will take you on your journey. Have a destination in mind and focus on that destination. Don't feel compelled to stay on the first course that you set. Many trips are altered as we go along. It's the destination that is important, as well as the experiences along the way.
Be in charge of your healing, because the power that this places you in is the antithesis of hopelessness and helplessness. Having a sense of you own personal power gives you control of your life.
Your life really is in your hands now.
Good luck, and until next time, may your God watch over you.
John Allan is a counsellor with more than fifteen years experience in assisting people with cancer and their carers. He is experienced in NLP and EFT and teaches meditation.